Conehead Nation — it'sSNLin Review: the penultimate episode of season 51!
We haveMatt Damonback in 8H, folks — he first appeared onSaturday Night Livein 2001 with a smallMango-related cameo, then hosted for the first time in 2002 during the season premiere. He later made another brief appearance in a digital short back in season 37, before returning a few times in 2018, both as host and as Brett Kavanaugh.
I am joined tonight by former SNL cast memberVictoria Jackson. She has a new book out,now available on Amazon. She says she hasn't seen all of Damon's films "because I get bored during 'running fast/bullet shooting/minimal dialogue' movies, but my husband, the ex-cop, loves theBourneseries.Good Will Huntingwas too mathematical for me." She also adds regarding tonight that "Matt doesn't project 'funny,' but if the writers do a good job, he will be funny. He has the timing and the looks. I respect his moral lifestyle and family values."
Meanwhile, tomorrow, of course, is Mother's Day. We know the show loves a goodmom sketch! Jackson shares: "Mother's Day, when I was onSNL, was a wonderful experience because my mom was in a sketch with me. They dressed us as identical, blonde twins and gave us both ditzy lines. They shot our scene at 1 a.m., and my mom, who doesn't seek the spotlight anyway, was so tired and bored she almost left the building to go sleep in her hotel. It was funny to me because most people would die to be in anSNLsketch. She'd rather sleep! My dad was the showbiz guy."
Cold Open
We are back at a "sneaky bar" in Georgetown — the iconic Martin's Tavern — with Colin Jost's Pete Hegseth. He is joined by Brett Kavanaugh (Damon), who is just as wild. The Supreme Court Justice laments the male loneliness epidemic; he does not have many drinking pals in the administration to go out with…guys like William Cosby!
Kash Patel (Aziz Ansari), the FBI director, shows up to assure him, boasting about his bourbon. So, season 50 is ending with celeb cameos in the cold open. I don't love Jost's star turn here, but at least he's an actual cast member. Ah, SEO! The sketch ends with the three dumb, fun-loving friends performing Chumbawamba's "Tubthumping."
Jackson thinks this cold open "was funny for people who closely follow politics! And Matt Damon was funny, and the casting was spot on! The Kash Patel face with the eyes was perfect!" Yes!
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Monologue
Damon is here to promote a movie coming out in nine weeks! Christopher Nolan'sThe Odyssey!
Damon acknowledges it is almost Mother's Day. With Spirit Airlines now gone, it turns out the show couldn't spring for the cast moms to fly in. Nice appearance by Jack Bensinger here, inquiring about Marcello's mom! Instead, Damon makes a "personal" video gift message for the moms out there, teasing the chance to see his new movie in theaters… in nine weeks. Jackson agrees, this was "funny! Marcello's mom!"
"Godzilla Movie"
We are watching the Movie Channel, one of the many Godzilla movies. The description of the monster's size and actions across the ocean is causing the ship's commander (Damon) to spit-take at his subordinate, Officer Harris (Mikey Day)... multiple times. "Lock in people," he says, requesting lumpy yogurt. He gets it and begins chowing down, as Harris confirms the authenticity of a video showing Godzilla's destruction.
The admiral wants everyone hydrated, just in time for the entire crew to sip water when a high-stakes message is translated from Japan. Oh boy! Jackson says, "Good ending. Godzilla spit take!! Usually, deadpan ex-cop husband said, 'Ya see, that was a good skit. That was actually funny. There was nothing political in there.'"
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"Mom Movie Trailer"
A movie devoid of conflict or dramatic tension! Moms have enough stress, so this movie has dialogue and a clean house… and Matt Damon as the husband. This movie trailer spoof was fun! Check it out.
Jackson has the same verdict: "FUNNY. Damon saying 'I noticed your massive necklace from the stage' and her ripping off her shoulder fabric and revealing her shoulder skin!"
"Tough Guys"
Three neighborhood tough guys are barbecuing with beers at a block party. They share stories about their toughness… with the punchline: they get their ass kicked. Pretty funny: each one unwittingly laments that everyone wants to be a tough guy, then tells a story to illustrate it, only to show the opposite. Their priest, their wives, their kids, elderly men in wheelchairs — all trying to be tough, successfully kicking their ass. Great work by Damon, Kenan Thompson, and even Marcello. Might be some of Marcello's best sketch work, honestly. Reminds me of the Billy Crystal-Christopher Guest "I hate when that happens" guys.
Jackson's "husband likes these tough guy sketches. He never watchesSNL,and he's laughing out loud… 'Gummy bear in the dog cage in the basement' — funny."
"Tidy Care Crystals"
It's Tidy Care Kitty Litter! Ever want to know how your cat is feeling? This cat litter product has color-changing powers, the "helpful" omniscient narrator voice explains. But is the human son peeing in the litter box? The voice keeps intruding, turning the seemingly happy married couple against each other. This is increasingly intense and brilliant. Jackson concurs: "FUNNY. Love it. Smart."
Noah Kahan performs "The Great Divide"
Through windows, Noah Kahan plays this single off his new album, which marked Kahan's solo comeback after nearly three years out of the spotlight.
The music video premiered in partnership with Mastercard during a commercial break at the Grammys in February. We are midway through the show, and Jackson thinks, "This is the best show since Nate Bargatze's show! Maybe even better!"
Weekend Update
Marco - Rubio! Kash - Patel! Jeffrey! Jokes include hantavirus, teacher appreciation week, WNBA, Patel's homemade whiskey, and Little Rascals.
TheMet Gala happened this week. It's a night of fashion and fun. Conservative commentator Tucker Carlson returns to comment on the outfits. Nice to see Jeremy Culhane back at the Update desk. I believe he was cut recently in a previous episode. "What are we doing?" indeed! Jackson says Culhane's "Tucker Carlson was pretty good, he got his high tremulous laugh down and calling Heidi Klum's Met Gala outfit the 'Statue of Liberty in a Burka' was funny." Overall, she notes, "Update was refreshingly light on the Trump-bashing".
Next, military officials recently refused to confirm the use of kamikaze dolphins in Iran. To comment: two dolphins (Day, Hernandez). Jost is shocked that this is real. He asks what they do before they get deployed. The answer? Deep ocean kinks. Water sex puns commence. "Let's shift gears…" says Jost, before shifting tothe ferry he owns with Pete Davidson.
Jane Wickline also comes out to comment on common tardiness. She has a song dedicated to everyone who's waited on her. It's less an apology than her doubling down — looking at her phone matters more than other people's time! "40 minutes with an ice cream cone!"
Story developing...
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